THE HONEY BADGER

7 minute read

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THE HONEY BADGER

By The Man in Black

Posted April, 2020.

(Preview. 10min read)

SYNOPSIS The year is 2032. Bitcoin is now the global reserve currency, The rich live in walled citadels while the poor fight for survival in a neoteric wild west.


EXT. CITY SKYLINE(STOCK) - DAWN (2032)

INT. EMPTY CAFE – DAWN

A man wearing an eye patch and biker attire sits at a table while drinking coffee and eating steak. He looks at his watch – the time reads 07:59. The block height reads 1,238,960. A news bulletin broadcasts from a radio transceiver on the table.

RADIO NEWS REPORTER ​Breaking news this afternoon, in the early hours of this morning, an armed assailant forced entry into a small mining farm on the outskirts of town - killing one and injuring another. One man was pronounced dead at the scene, while the second man is said to be in stable condition. Immediately after the attack, the survivor broadcast a message via Bitcoin satellite - satnode. The message claims that the assailant stole a hard drive which once belonged to Bitcoin creator Satoshi Nakamoto.

The man glances at a small-black briefcase that sits next to him on a chair while cutting his steak.

RADIO NEWS REPORTER The message states that the hard drive holds the encrypted keys to Satoshi Nakamoto’s one million Bitcoin fortune and clues to the creators real identity. It is still unclear whether the drive is genuine, but one eye witness reports that shortly after the incident, THE HODLERS WATCH attended the crime scene and transported the unknown survivor to the citadel; escorted by their elite mercenary commando team - THE DREAD PIRATES. The Hodlers Watch declined to comment on the situation, although they are urging anyone with information to come forward. We will bring you more updates as the story unfolds.

The man takes a drink of his coffee. FREEZE FRAME on the man’s face. TITLE OVER - THE BEAR

RADIO NEWS REPORTER In other news, 18 people were killed last night as the freaks attempted a second siege on the citadel in just over a week. The casualties included 17 gang members and 1 citadel sentry. The Hodlers Watch say they will be increasing security along the perimeter wall due to the increased number of recent attacks.

​The Bear puts down the knife and fork and chews his last piece of steak.

RADIO NEWS REPORTER Synthetic meat corporation – synthomeats - continues to expand. The corporation recently completed its latest development of a 5 acre super-lab in the Satoshi Springs district. The high speed rail network which connects the super-lab to the citadel, is due to be fully operational over the coming days.

The Bear drinks the last of his coffee and wipes his mouth with his sleeve. He takes a wad of thin-flexible notes from the inside of his black-leather, biker jacket. The notes are mostly transparent with a visible integrated circuit board inside. Around the perimeter of the note is a strip of solar cells. The centre displays a luminescent blue Bitcoin denomination in Satoshis. The top right corner has a printed QR code.

RADIO NEWS REPORTER Scientists at the afterlife extension program have reportedly made a breakthrough after reanimating the first ever human being. The subject was said to have fully functioning speech but unfortunately died after 6 hours of reanimation. Our next bulletin will be at 2100 hours. Thank you to our sponsor Scav4sats America.

The Bear counts out 3 notes, each displaying 300 satoshis and puts them down on the table.

RADIO ADVERTISEMENT (over the top American salesman) Tired of being the same poor you? Tired of being out of sats and scavenging for your next meal? Hi, I’m Wade Goodwin – owner, operator and founder of Scav4Sats America, and I’m here to tell ya, you don’t have to be stuck with what you’ve got. One mans junk is another man’s treasure and here at Scav4sats America, we’ll turn your old into digital gold. With 4 locations situated around the citadel wall…

The Bear turns off the radio transceiver and puts it into his pocket. He picks up the small briefcase and exits the cafe.

EXT. STREET – DAWN The Bear stands in a dirty, abandoned street. The sun is creeping up just below the horizon. Glimpses of orange light reflect from the windows of the high rise buildings. To the right – in the distance – a small group of men are huddled around a fire in a barrel. Steam slowly HISSES from a manhole cover in the middle of a pot-holed road. The Bear pulls out a cigarette from a crumpled packet. He strikes a match against the side of a match box and cups the flame while lighting the cigarette. He walks calmly down the street, croses the road and enters an alleyway.

EXT. ALLEYWAY – DAWN The Bear walks down the dark alleyway. An echo of a BOTTLE DROPPING and a SINISTER LAUGH rings out in the distance. The Bear pauses to look at a malnourished HOBO slumped in a doorway. he’s holding a piece of rotten cardboard that has an image of a QR code with the words “spare sats” written underneath. FREEZE FRAME on hobo’s face. TITLE OVER - ROGER.

The Bear takes out a handful of Bitcoin notes from the inside of his leather jacket and places them in an empty tin by the hobo’s feet.

ROGER Bless you…bless you fine gentleman.

As The Bear rises up, a mysterious shadowy figure stands before him. FREEZE FRAME on the mysterious figure’s face. TITLE OVER - THE BULL.

The Bull is wearing what looks like a SCUBA suit, with over layers of Kevlar bi-weave body armour covering the chest, arms, calves and thighs; hidden under a long trench coat. The hooded man has a gas mask attached to his face and his leather gloves house iron plated knuckles.

THE BULL I’m afraid you’re going to have to put the Lambo on hold.

THE BEAR Lambos are overrated, I’m holding out for a life extension plan and a ticket off this goddamn planet. ​ THE BULL Hand it over, walk away, and I’ll let you live.

The Bear takes a drag on his cigarette.

THE BEAR I should have shot you when I had the chance.

​>THE BULL

Could’a, would’a, should’a.

Both men silently stare at each other. The Bear takes another drag of his cigarette. As he pulls the cigarette from his lips, he violently flicks it at The Bull, the embers ricochet from his Kevlar armour like a spitting fire. The Bear draws for his holstered black, sawn-off, shotgun. As he raises the weapon, the Bull charges at him, deflecting the gun away. A shot discharges from the barrel, blowing Rogers head clean off. The blood soaked cardboard QR code now unreadable.

The pair tussle for control over the gun, but momentum flings it under a steel dumpster. A fist fight ensues. Both men are skilled fighters, neither land any clean blows. The pair clinch. The Bull forcefully throws The Bear against the dumpster. The Bear sprints and tackles the Bull and they both crash through a pane glass window of an abandoned pizza shop.

ANGLE ON shop front.

The sounds of men FIGHTING and BOTTLES BREAKING can be heard inside of the shop. A MAN wearing a blue azure boiler suit is thrown through a second pane glass window - landing in the alleyway. After a momentary pause, two GUNSHOTS are heard. The shop door swings open and a second man also wearing a blue azure boiler suit limps out holding the briefcase. THE LIMPER stumbles out of the alley towards the road.

The Bear runs out of the shop looking left and right. He runs towards the steel container, retrieving his shotgun from underneath. He heads down the alleyway and removes a pile of black-plastic trash bags to reveal a motorcycle underneath. He holsters his shotgun at the side of the motorcycle and kick starts the bike. He rides towards the road, briefly stopping at Rogers body. He reaches into the tin, taking back his donation and puts the notes into his jacket pocket. The tyres SQUEAL as he exits to the street. The licence plate reads NO2X.

EXT. CITY ROAD - DAWN.

The Bear cruises down the desolate road. In the distance he notices The Limper hobbling along the side walk carrying the briefcase. The Bear slows down and mounts the side walk on his motorcycle. As he approaches the Limper, he pulls out the holstered shotgun, takes aim and shoots him in the back. The Limper is blown forward off of his feet - landing on his face. The Bear stops beside him and dismounts. He kicks the Limper over on to his back and rests one foot on top of the his chest. The Bear cocks open his shotgun and loads two slugs into the barrel.

THE LIMPER Please…plea…

The Bear flicks up the shotgun and shoots the Limper in the face. He picks up the briefcase and puts it into a saddlebag attached to the side of his motorcycle. He holsters his shotgun and kick starts the bike. As he rides off down the road. The title credits role to the track JUNGLE BOOGIE – KOOL & THE GANG.


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